Tag: holidays

A Halloween Memory

stephaniemoorewrites
Wonder Woman attacking an unknowing Superman.

Last year, I was staying home to hand out candy, the boys were out with cousins and friends, so Rory was trick or treating with my sister and her youngers.

My sister called and asked me to send Rory over. I got her shoes on and sent her out the door. (My sister was at my mom’s, who lived right behind us.)

I gave away some candy. And maybe 5 minutes later my sister called again. “Where’s Rory?”

This was not an usual question. (And, unfortunately, still isn’t.)

My distracted, wandering wild flower.

I looked around a little then asked a neighbor that was trick or treating, “Have you seen Rory?”

“Yeah, she’s down the street with the Vriens family.”

She saw a group of her friends, forgot her destination, and just joined in.

But almost on cue, I see my cute Wonder Woman running back down the cul-de-sac.

After a quick hug, I sent her on her way to my mom’s to have an awesome night of family and candy.

Happy 80th Birthday, Ron!

stephaniemoorewrites

This past weekend we got to spend time with Lance’s family to celebrate his dad’s 80th birthday.

Almost all his siblings were there. We played games, did work around the house, ate great food, and just enjoyed being together.

My mind kept reflecting back to when we were there two years ago to wish Ron a happy birthday.

I have no doubt Rory’s there wishing you a happy birthday too.

Love you, Ron!

Bracing For Impact

stephaniemoorewrites

I feel like I’m in a car.

The rain is turning to snow. My limbs are cold, a bit numb.

I don’t know the destination, but I have my family in there with me.

As I go to make a turn, my tires slide. I turn into the slide. And I spin. And spin.

Then I see it. Five feet ahead, there’s a wall.

I take one last glance around at each face then I grip the steering wheel.

Bracing for impact.

That’s where I’m at right now.

Bracing for impact.

I’m staring down the year mark. One year without my baby girl.

One year without her hugs.

One year without her laughs.

One year without her cuddles.

One year of holidays without her.

One more first holiday without her left. Halloween.

The tears are coming quicker.

My heart pounds harder, faster.

The breakdowns are increasing.

I’m in a tailspin.

Holding on.

And holding on.

Trying to prepare for what’s coming.

Traditions

stephaniemoorewrites

I was asked a few times, “So what do you guys do for the 4th?”

Any kind of question like that right now is just impossible.

I don’t know.

I don’t want to do traditions any longer. There’s a key player that’s missing right now. How can we be happy doing the same thing we usually do?

But how do I also keep some normalcy for the boys?

That’s my tightrope walk.

Yesterday we grilled.

We hung out with my parents and new friends.

Set off small fireworks.

And we bought a new van. (Pictures coming soon!)

New traditions.

Mixed with old traditions.

And I had no full blown panic attack yesterday.

I consider that a success.