Tag: my story

The New Me

stephaniemoorewrites

There are going to be some themes that will carry between multiple blog posts. This is one of them.

I’m a different person.

My emotions are heighten. Any given time, any given day. They’re high.

Before, if you measured my emotions on a yard stick, they’d probably be around the foot mark. Toward the middle. My emotions could heighten but I’d still have a good two feet before I was ready to lose it.

It’s not like that anymore.

Especially on harder days.

I cry easily.

Get frustrated easier.

Sometimes I think, “Do they not know what’s going on in my head?”

They don’t.

No one does. And it’s not an expectation I really have.

I try and take more breaths before I react. Try to have more patience than I’m really feeling. Try to keep my crap together until I get to my van.

I don’t love this new part of me. But I’m hoping time will bring more self control.

But What Now?

stephaniemoorewrites

 

Rory and me at the grand canyon low res

Since Rory passed away, I’ve had this feeling.

I can’t let it be for nothing.

But here’s the thing.

It was appendicitis.

There’s no “Race for the Cure”. It’s something that has a cure.

There are no groups for appendicitis.

There’s nothing to get behind surrounding her condition or death.

Then I thought. This is what I have.

I have my words.

I have my story.

I have her story.

I’m going to take a leap from Facebook posts and open up to others. Those I might not know yet. But we need each other’s stories.

We need each other’s love.